It’s been a long time since I’ve put myself out into the world in the way I just did. This goes beyond just writing a story and letting someone read it, which, I admit, is hard enough. I like to think I put on a good poker face. I’m unflusterable behind the scenes. I act natural and everyone thinks I have massive confidence. And I have some confidence. I’m a good writer. I’m a good editor.
But today I submitted a Kickstarter campaign for a project I’ve been working on with a lot of other people for almost two years. I spent weeks perfecting the page and stressing over the video and rewards. Then I popped it up there, pressed the send button.
I was so nervous I almost got the giggles several times during the making of the video which we did in one take. I didn’t notice until later that I actually called Tim my cohort and compatriot, both of which are either inaccurate or just plain weird. I said to him afterward, “Did I call you my cohort? As in platoon?” I guess that was it. My announcement that Tim is my platoon. Now you know. He is my army of god-like men. Together we kick the butts of books everywhere. Or something.
Anyway, when you watch me up there, I’d like you to know that this project is important to me. I’ve poured myself into these pages. I’ve begged and cajoled people into writing and drawing for it. I’ve reasoned and risked. I’m both excited and terrified now.
You all are my peers. I want you to like me. I want you to like it.
I join the ranks of those who know how this feels. Rite of passage, I think.